Susan Granger’s review of “Bad Santa 2” (Broad Green Pictures/Miramax)
Over the years, Billy Bob Thornton’s contemptible “Bad Santa” has become a comedic antidote to Yuletide treacle. But this sequel is a cold lump of wet coal.
Safecracking, alcoholic Willie Soke (Thornton) is having a really bad day when his old crony, Marcus (Tony Cox), sends cash, a cell-phone and an offer to rework their Christmas robbery scam in Chicago. Problem is: Marcus betrayed him, so how can Willie trust him again?
In Willie’s world, greed triumphs good sense, so he heads to the Windy City, where Marcus reveals that the real mastermind of the operation is Willie’s estranged mother, larcenous Sunny Soke (Kathy Bates).
Scornful Sunny volunteers at a Salvation Army-like charity run by sexy Diane (Christina Hendricks) and her philandering husband Regent (Ryan Hansen). They provide shelter for homeless men, dressing them as Santa Claus and sending them out to solicit money during the holiday season.
Sunny has carefully planned the $2 million heist to take place during the Christmas Eve Concert. But the crooks have to obtain certain keys carried by a hefty security guard (Jenny Zigrino), whom diminutive Marcus, then lecherous Willie try to seduce.
Complicating matters, now-grown, yet still cherubic Thurman Merman (Brett Kelly) – for whom Willie hired a prostitute (Octavia Spencer) to “pop his cherry” on his 21st birthday – still worships cantankerous Willie, following him to Chicago so he won’t spend Christmas alone.
Screenwriters Johnny Rosenthal and Shauna Cross attempt to replicate what made the original script click – although, certainly, audience appetite for rancid, R-rated humor has changed since 2003 – yet director Mark Walters (“Mean Girls”) can’t reproduce Terry Zwigoff’s crass, maniacal nastiness, even at the annual Santa-Con.
Furthermore, it boggles the mind that three Academy Award-winners (Thornton, Bates and Spencer) have stooped this low.
On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Bad Santa 2” is a disappointing 2, proving that politically incorrect vulgarity isn’t always funny.