Susan Granger’s review of “Takers” (Screen Gems)
Jimmy Buffett wrote a song called “Overkill” and that’s the word which best describes this high-powered yet formulaic heist movie that’s punctuated with shootouts and explosions, particularly a stylized machine-gun gangbang with Russian mobsters that decimates a Los Angeles hotel suite.
The action commences with a cleverly staged bank robbery, culminating with the slick hijacking of a TV news helicopter as a getaway vehicle which is then landed and exploded in Dodger Stadium. The GQ-attired, cool-as-cucumber, multi-racial thieves are led by Gordon Jennings (British Idris Elba of “The Wire”) and include strutting brothers Jake and Jesse Attica (Michael Ealy, Chris Brown) along with buddies John Rahway (Paul Walker) and hip A.J. (Hayden Christensen). Bewildered by the gang’s finesse and a discouraging lack of surveillance camera clues, hardworking L.A.P.D. detectives Jack Welles (Matt Dillon) and Eddie Hatcher (Jay Hernandez) are, nevertheless, determined to track the culprits down. The lawmen catch a break when a recently released ex-con Ghost (rapper-producer Tip “T.I.” Harris) approaches the Dom Perignon-sipping, Cuban cigar-puffing thieves in their posh penthouse hangout with a tantalizing offer they can’t refuse: to orchestrate a complicated multi-million-dollar armored-car takedown in just five days.
After all, as one character says, “We’re takers. That’s what we do. We take.”
Co-written and stylishly directed by John Luessenhop (“Lockdown”), this complicated caper was obviously inspired by action helmer Michael Mann’s “Heat,” along with countless Quentin Tarantino gangster epics. Unfortunately, however, the script unfolds as if it was assembled by a committee which – with four additional screenwriters (Peter Allen, Gabirel Casseus, Avery Duff) – it obviously was. Double-crosses and betrayals abound, along with laughable clichés, caricatured portrayals, and a riveting but exhausting street chase. The two talented females in the cast – Zoe Saldana (“Avatar”), as Jake’s fiancée, and Marianne Jean-Baptiste (“Secrets and Lies”), as Gordon’s drug-addicted sister – are given far too little to do. And as a perpectually-scowling divorced dad, Matt Dillon ill-advisedly totes his young daughter on a high-speed chase.
On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Takers” is a frenzied 4. Wait for the dvd.