Susan Granger’s review of “THE SWEETEST THING” (Columbia Pictures)
It’s only April and we already have a viable candidate for the Worst Picture of the Year award. How bad is it? So bad that delectable Cameron Diaz with her dazzling smile ends up looking downright dowdy. Living in San Francisco, Diaz plays a 28 year-old tease with a serious commitment problem. She doesn’t want Mr. Right. She wants Mr. Right Now – and no more geeky guys need apply. One night, she and her partygirl roommates – Christina Applegate (“Married… With Children”) and Selma Blair (“Legally Blonde”) – go cruising at their favorite nightspot with sexcapades intentions. Cameron and hunky Thomas Jane “meet cute,” meaning she accidentally spills beer on him, which opens a conversation that culminates in his telling her that his brother is throwing a bachelor party and inviting her to come along. Unfortunately, she never learns his last name before he disappears. So the trio of blunt, bodacious buddies decided to make a road trip to a town three hours away and crash the what they think is his brother’s wedding so that Cameron can find him again. What they don’t realize is that Mr. Right is actually the groom. Screenwriter Nancy M. Pimental (“South Park”) and director Roger Kumble (“Cruel Intentions”) are so determined to dump the generic concept of romantic comedy on its head that they land on their ass, making the women in this role reversal as lewd, dumb and disgusting as possible. The slapstick toilet humor and vulgar jokes about oral sex, including a couple who become orally entangled, lack the inventiveness of “There’s Something About Mary,” and there’s nothing amusing about a gal projectile vomiting on a guy. On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “The Sweetest Thing” is a grossly thudding 2. Hitting below the belt, it definitely leaves a sour taste.
