|
|
Susan Granger’s review of “Battleship” (Universal Pictures)
Chock full of excitement and explosives, this is a popcorn picture extravaganza – delivering noisy, escapist entertainment to those who enjoy the classic Hasbro board game.
As ships from around the world gather off the coast of Hawaii for their annual RIMCAP naval exercises, the exploratory Beacon Project that was sent into space has reached a planet with a similar atmosphere to Earth. As a result, five gigantic spaceships filled with hostile aliens from another galaxy are headed our way – and who can stop them?
Could it be the Hopper brothers: 26 year-old maverick Alex (Taylor Kitsch) and his straitlaced older brother Stone (Alexander Skarsgard)? First glimpsed at a bar on Oahu, they’re a good guess. Because after a large, unknown object is spotted jutting out of the sea near his Navy destroyer, USS John Paul Jones, now-Lieutenant Alex Hopper is sent out to investigate, along with Petty Officer Second Class Cora Raikes (pop star Rihanna), a tough-as-nails weapons specialist. Then, of course, the enemy missiles attack. For romantic distraction, Alex has become engaged to physical therapist Samantha (Brooklyn Decker), whose father, Admiral Shane (Liam Neeson), commands the Pacific Fleet. She’s working with double-amputee Army veteran Mick Canales (real-life Iraq hero Gregory D. Gadson) and scientist Cal Zapata (Hamish Linklater), who devises a way to break the aliens’ communication wall.
Inspired by the board game, screenwriting brothers Jon and Erich Hoeber (“RED”) haphazardly piece together a bland, cliché-riddled, interstellar story, beginning with the discovery of a so-called “Goldilocks planet,” meaning that it’s close enough to, yet far enough away from the sun to sustain life. Since neither Taylor Kitsch (“John Carter”) nor model Brooklyn Decker displays much acting ability, the emotional stakes are remarkably low. However, little of that is of much interest to director Peter Berg (“Hancock,” “Friday Night Lights”) and his Industrial Light & Magic production crew, who concentrate on creating the big-budget, naval combat “Transformer”-like special effects.
On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Battleship” steams to an energetic, action-filled 5 – but it’s flimsy, formulaic and far too long.
Susan Granger’s review of “Think Like a Man” (Screen Gems)
Perhaps turn-about is fair play, so just think of this wannabe romantic comedy as an African-American variation on “He’s Not Just That Into You,” exploring contemporary human behavior, specifically the differences between the way men and women approach sex and romantic relationships. Opening with a series of animated vignettes, it charts courting rituals from prehistoric times right up to the present.
The story’s narrator Cedric (Kevin Hart), dubbed “Happily Divorced Guy,” notes, “the balance of power has sifted,” and references his stereotypical, basketball-playing L.A. buddies as prime examples. There’s Dominic (Michael Ealy), “The Dreamer,” a struggling chef who, while working as a valet behind the wheel of a Porsche, attracts a determined, status-conscious career woman (Taraji P. Henson), labeled “Woman Who Is Her Own Man.” There’s sensitive Michael (Terrence J), “The Mama’s Boy,” who is keeping company with a single mom, Candace (Regina Hall), but cannot untie the apron strings at home. Suave Zeke (comedian Romany Malco) is attracted to “Party Girl” Mya (Megan Good), who won’t let him into her bedroom to consummate their relationship for 90 days; that three-month period is in order to “keep the cookie in the cookie jar.” “Non Committer” Jeremy (Jerry Ferrara) is a low-aspiring nerd whose long-time best-friend, “Ring Girl” Kristen (Gabrielle Union), is tired of waiting for him and needs to fast-track the marriage proposal.
Written by Keith Merryman and David A. Newman and directed by Tim Story (“Barbershop”), it’s based on the humorous dating advice book “Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man” (2009) by comedian Steve Harvey, who dispenses tips right into the camera periodically, revealing how, while men lie and evade as they realize they’re being nagged and manipulated into commitment, perhaps it’s all for the best in the end, so to speak.
FYI: Pop singer Chris Brown briefly appears in a cameo obviously typecast as an obnoxious player.
On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Think Like a Man” is a retro, formulaic 4, acting primarily as an infomercial promotion for Steve Harvey’s self-help book.
Susan Granger’s DVD Update for week of Fri., May 18:
Based on Janet Evanovich’s best-seller, “One for the Money” stars Katherine Heigl as Stephanie Plum, a street-savvy Jersey gal who gets a job at her cousin’s bail bonding company and must track down her high school ex-boyfriend (Jason O’Mara).
Also set in New Jersey, “You’ll Know My Name” is a coming-of-age drama, examining an angry, entitled generation that has lost touch and can’t understand why.
In “Rampart,” Woody Harrelson plays a sleazy, bullheaded cop, working as part of the militaristic, notoriously intolerant Rampart Division of the Los Angeles Police Department in the late 1990s.
The mock documentary “Chronicle” blends adolescent fantasy with timely commentary about bullying, as three teens discover they have acquired mysterious superpowers. In the same ‘found footage’ sub-genre, “The Devil Inside” is a spooky, supernatural stunt, revolving around an American woman (Suzan Crowley) who confessed to a triple homicide and is being held by the Vatican in at a hospital for the criminally insane in Rome.
“Norman Mailer: The American” goes beyond the author on the bookshelves, examining this working-class iconoclast as a social critic, family man, filmmaker and lover, while “We Were Here” is a heartbreaking cinematic exploration of the beginning of the AIDS crisis.
For foreign film aficionados, “Michael” is a German observational chiller about a seemingly meek insurance agent who holds a 10 year-old captive in a locked room in his basement for five months.
For youngsters, there’s a new Chuggington “Wilson and the Ice Cream Fair,” as a brave trainee helps Frostini create a new flavor for the mayor’s banquet…globe-trotting hi-jinks in ”Scooby-Do! 13 Spooky Tales Around the World”…a dino-mite ride in ”Barney: Planes, Trains & Cars”…fun in the sun with “Bob the Builder: Adventures By the Sea”…and a 20-episode, 2-disc set ”Thomas & Friends: Engine Friends Classic Collection.”
PICKS OF THE WEEK: In the Victorian drama “Albert Nobbs,” Glenn Close delivers a splendid performance, creating a fascinating, if far-fetched façade as a butler in 19th century Dublin, working with Janet McTeer and courting Mia Wasikowska. And in the intense, survivalist thriller, “The Grey,” Liam Neeson plays a despondent sharpshooter stranded in the snowy Alaskan wilderness.
Susan Granger’s review of “Girl in Progress” (Lionsgate/Pantelion)
Preoccupied with juggling waitressing/cleaning jobs, an avalanche of bills, the attentions of busboy Mission (Eugenio Derbez) and an illicit affair with a married gynecologist, Dr. Harford (Matthew Modine), self-absorbed Seattle single mom Grace (Eva Mendes) doesn’t seem to have much time to devote to her precocious tween daughter, Ansiedad (Cierra Ramirez).
So when Ansiedad’s high-school English teacher, Mrs. Armstrong (Patricia Arquette) introduces her students to the cultural rites in classic coming-of-age stories, resentful Ansiedad decides to bypass adolescence, grow up quickly with the help of her loyal friend, Tavita (Raini Rodriguez), and take off for New York.
Formulaically scripted by Dominican-born, New York-raised Hiram Martinez and directed by Mexico’s Patricia Riggen (who helmed the immigrant drama “Under the Same Moon”), this sudsy melodrama combines pubescent high-school apprehension with hackneyed overworked mom angst, serving neither genre particularly well since the emotionally connective tissue seems to be missing.
While she much prefers to be called ‘Ann,’ it’s significant that the name Ansiedad means “anxiety” in Spanish. Pantelion is a joint venture of Lionsgate Films and Televisa, the Mexican entertainment corporation that’s trying to carve an ethnic niche for itself in the United States with Latino-aimed ‘familia’ fare like Will Ferrell’s Spanish-speaking comedy “Casa de mi Padre.”
Usually cast in femme fatale/seductress roles or as the glamorous spokesperson for Calvin Klein’s Secret Obsession fragrance and Seductive Comfort underwear, Eva Mendes delivers a surprisingly ingratiating performance, even actually appearing blue-collar frumpy in one or two scenes, as the aimless, irresponsible Hispanic mother who had Ansiedad when she was just a teenager herself and has continued to live a peripatetic existence. Her dedication and emotional range is matched by naively spirited Cierra Ramirez. Too bad they weren’t given a more plausible, in-depth narrative to work with.
Any whatever possessed Patricia Riggen to cast 20 year-old Brenna O’Brien as Valerie, the high-school bad girl? She looks far too old to be 17 year-old Cierra’s gal pal.
On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Girl in Progress” is a contrived, cliché-filled 5, culminating in a predictable conclusion.
Susan Granger’s review of “Leap of Faith” (St. James Theater: 2011-2012 season)
There’s a reason why this screen-to-stage adaptation was – financially – the biggest flop of Broadway’s 2011-2012 season with losses estimated at more than $14 million. Quite simply, the redemptive musical about a con-man evangelist who experiences a spiritual conversion was wretched, despite an experienced creative team that included composer Alan Menken, lyricist Glenn Slater, book writers James Cercone and Warren Leight, director Christopher Ashley, set designer Robin Wagner and choreographer Sergio Trujillo.
Clad in sparkly suits, Raul Esparza (“Company,” “Arcadia”) takes on the role of faith healer Jonas Nightingale, which genial Steve Martin played in the 1992 movie. After their bus breaks down in Sweetwater, a small town in Kansas, Nightingale and his troupe pitch their revival tent and are soon fleecing the flock with the help of Nightingale’s sister, Sam (Kendra Kassebaum) who secretly feeds info to the preacher. The local sheriff, Maria McGowan (Jessica Phillips), has their number but she’s also a lonely widow with a brave, disabled son, 13 year-old Jake (Talon Ackerman), and obviously smitten with this sinister new man in town. Besides, there’s this severe draught and maybe, just maybe, if he’s not a complete charlatan, Nightingale could conjure down some rain.
While Esparza exudes energy, it’s been a rough road to get to Broadway and many elements were lost along the way, including pacing and the kind of essential coherence that distinguished other charismatic con-man tales like “The Rainmaker,” “The Music Man” and “Dirty Rotten Scoundrels,” among others. The original director never got beyond the Los Angeles tryout, nor did the original female star, Brooke Shields. The collaborative duo of Alan Menken and Glenn Slater. who wrote the music for “Sister Act,” contribute oddly similar numbers for this show, which begs for some originality, particularly for the backup gospel choir called the Angels of Mercy, led by Ida Mae Sturdevant (Kecia Lewis-Evans).
Closing almost as soon as it opened, “Leap of Faith” concludes this musical season on Broadway. Praise the Lord – and Amen!
Susan Granger’s review of “The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel” (Fox Searchlight Pictures)
Culture shock lies in store for seven, cash-strapped senior Brits who board a plane from London to Jaipur, ready to embark on the third act of their lives.
There’s recently widowed Evelyn Greenslade (Judi Dench), retired High-Court judge Graham Dashwood (Tom Wilkinson), lonely Madge Hardcastle (Celia Imrie), randy Norman Cousins (Ronald Pickup), quarrelsome Douglas and Jean Ainslie (Bill Nighy, Penelope Wilton), and former housekeeper Muriel Donnelly (Maggie Smith) who, while awaiting a low-cost hip replacement, adamantly refuses to eat anything she doesn’t know how to pronounce.
Their destination in India is the once stately but now dilapidated hotel which is managed as a retirement residence “for the elderly and beautiful” by relentlessly optimistic, if hopelessly inexperienced Sonny Kapoor (Dev Patel from “Slumdog Millionaire”). Enthusiastic Sonny’s sincere earnestness tries to compensate for the lack of doors, functional telephones and plumbing as he pursues the ‘forbidden’ love of his life, Sunaina (Indian actress Tena Desai), a call center worker.
Adapted from the 2004 novel “These Foolish Things” by Deborah Moggach, this bittersweet, fish-out-of-water comedic drama, poignantly scripted by Ol Parker and compassionately directed by John Madden (“Shakespeare in Love,” “The Debt”), is a bit reminiscent of Robert Altman’s interweaving ensembles, along with “Enchanted April” and “Cocoon,” in the way the lives of these expectant travelers are radically changed as they encounter challenges in this foreign culture and accommodate to its customs. On a deeper level, there’s a subtle, heartfelt commentary on ‘outsourcing’ the elderly, along with customer service call centers, in countries where their limited funds will go further.
The accomplished cast of seasoned thespians makes the most out of every witty scene, along with a character unto itself: the distinctively architected hotel, a former chieftain’s palace, located several hundred miles southwest of Udaipur. Cinematographer Ben Davis artfully captures the inherent cacophony and incessant chaos of careening tuk-tuks in the vividly colorful street scenes.
On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel” is an adventurous 8. Anglophiles should check in and check it out.
Susan Granger’s review of “Don’t Dress For Dinner” (American Airlines Theater: 2011-12 season)
Marc Camoletti’s naughty bedroom farce reunites the characters of Bernard (Adam James) and Robert (Ben Daniels), last seen on Broadway romancing airline stewardesses in Camoletti’s previous comedy “Boeing-Boeing.”
Set in 1960 in a converted farmhouse northwest of Paris, it begins as Bernard’s wife, Jacqueline (Patricia Kalember) is preparing to depart to spend the weekend with her mother. Unbeknownst to her, Bernard has slyly planned a rendezvous with his mistress Suzanne (Jennifer Tilly), a voluptuously vulgar model. But when the telephone rings, Jacqueline discovers to her delight that Bernard’s best friend Robert will be arriving shortly. Since Robert is Jacqueline’s secret lover, she quickly cancels her plans and decides to stay to have a tryst with her paramour, forcing Bernard to make Robert promise to cover for him by introducing Suzanne as his girl-friend. More frantic confusion commences as Suzette (Spencer Kayden), the Cordon Bleu chef whom Bernard has hired to cater an elegant, romantic dinner, arrives – and Robert assumes that she is Suzanne. Eventually, Suzette agrees to pose as Robert’s girlfriend/niece or whatever but she disdainfully demands additional bribery payments from both men for each layer of philandering deception – until her own beefy husband, George (David Aron Damane) shows up in the second act.
Despite John Tillinger’s stylish staging of the mistaken identities and double-entendres and the cast’s obvious effort to try to keep the pace fast, the labored, over-the-top characters and their alleged ardor never really ring true – which makes it so simple for comedienne Spencer Kayden to steal the show – even without whipping up cheese soufflé and baked Alaska.
John Lee Beatty’s chateau set evokes a sense of rustic elegance, giving rise to amusing lines about the converted dairy, hen house, pig sty and hay loft, but it is William Ivey Long’s inventive costume-change, as Suzette swiftly transforms from mousy maid to slinky, strapless vamp, that evokes spontaneous applause.
BOTTOM LINE: If you’ve never seen a French sex farce, you might find this hilarious. But if you’ve seen several before, this Roundabout Theatre Company production is only mediocre.
Susan Granger’s review of “Dark Shadows” (Warner Bros.)
Slyly laced with weird, supernatural humor, Tim Burton brings back the cult classic series with deliciously demonic Johnny Depp as gothic vampire Barnabas Collins.
In 1750, young Barnabas sailed from Liverpool with his parents, who built a fishing empire in the coastal Maine town known as Collinsport. But Barnabas fell in love with beautiful Josette (Bella Heathcote), infuriating Angelique (Eva Green), a witch who killed Josette and cursed Barnabas for eternity.
Some 196 years later, when his crypt is accidentally excavated, Barnabas elegantly emerges into 1972, bewildered by cars and TV sets, not to mention lava lamps, which he calls “pulsating blood urns.” Despite the efforts of its caretaker (Jackie Earle Haley), Barnabas’s ancestral home, Collinwood Manor, is in ruins, as the financially-strapped family matriarch (Michelle Pfeiffer) tries to cope with her angry, rebellious teenage daughter (Chloe Grace Moretz). Barnabas’s arrival coincides that that of a young governess, Victoria (Bella Heathcote), persecuted because of her mysterious psychic gift. Victoria’s charge is 10 year-old David (Gully McGrath), who talks to his dead mother and is neglected by his wastrel father (Jonny Lee Miller), despite efforts of the Collins’ resident psychiatrist, (Helena Bonham-Carter).
Worst of all, Collinsport has been transformed into Angelsbay, named for its most prominent businesswoman, known as Angie (Eva Green). Declaring, “Family is the only real wealth,” Barnabas vows revenge, determined to right the wrongs done over the past two centuries.
Imaginative Tim Burton directs from Seth Grahame-Smith and John August’s screenplay, based on Dan Curtis’s vividly melodramatic ABC-TV series, broadcast weekdays from June 27, 1966, to April 2, 1971, amassing more episodes (1,225) than most other sci-fi series, including “Doctor Who” and “Star Trek.”
Kudos go to production designer Rick Heinrichs for the atmospheric interiors, Bruno Delbonnel for the eerie cinematography, and Danny Elfman for the pulsating score – with cameos by Christopher Lloyd and Alice Cooper, plus original cast members Jonathan Frid, Lara Parker, Kathryn Leigh Scott and David Selby.
On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Dark Shadows” is an enduringly escapist 8, a murderously funny fantasy.
Susan Granger’s review of “Musical Chairs” (Paladin)
Independent filmmaker Susan Seidelman’s sentiment is in the right place, even though she never gets into the groove with this schmaltzy tale about disabled dancers.
Energetic Armando (E.J. Bonilla) was born to dance. Despite the efforts of his meddling mother, Isabella (Priscilla Lopez), to have him take over the family restaurant business in the Bronx and marry their nice Puerto Rican neighbor, Rosa (Angelic Zambrana), Armando would rather move to the music. That’s why he hangs out, working as a janitor/substitute teacher, at the dance studio where his adored WASPy Mia (Leah Pipes) is an instructor. And when she’s paralyzed from the waist down after a traumatic automobile accident, he stays by her side, not only starting an evening wheelchair ballroom dancing program on the basketball court at her rehab center but also working with Mia to get her ready to compete in New York’s first wheelchair ballroom dancing tournament – to be held in only three months.
Best known for “Desperately Seeking Susan” and “Boynton Beach Club,” Susan Seidelman does her best with the predictably melodramatic plot concocted by screenwriter Marty Madden. Unfortunately, the supporting characters are all too trite and stereotypical. There’s the obnoxious Iraqi War veteran Kenny (Morgan Spencer), the angry Goth girl Nikki (Auti Angel), and Chantelle (Laverne Cox), the sassy transsexual who becomes romantically involved with Wilfredo (Nelson P. Landrieu), one of Armando’s older Latino relatives.
Jose Edgar Osorio’s choreography is not only admirable but evocative of classic dance routines in Fred Astaire/Gene Kelly musicals.
Problem is: the superficial narrative contains distressing misinformation. While some paralyzed people can, indeed, become adroit in physical activities like ballroom dancing, along with basketball and other sports, but – in order to master that kind of control of their bodies – they have to spend months, perhaps years in grueling rehabilitation, not 90 days. Another misguided idea is that handicapped women cannot bear children; in many cases, they can – and do.
On the Granger Movie Gauge of 1 to 10, “Musical Chairs” is a simpatico if shallow 6, struggling to be a life-affirming, feel-good fantasy.
Susan Granger’s DVD UPDATE for week of Fri., May 11:
There are lots of mom-themed movies (“I Remember Mama,” “Mommy Dearest,” “Baby Mama”) but there’s nothing quite like murderous Rebecca De Mornay’s “Mother’s Day,” a bloody, visceral, home-invasion remake of the 1980 Troma horror film.
Coinciding with the release of Tim Burton’s movie, the complete original series of “Dark Shadows” rises again in a colossal, custom coffin-shaped, 131-box set, featuring 1,225 episodes, with bonus, in-depth interviews, a commemorative booklet and other video extras for a whopping $599.98!
Or if you’re into syrupy, sentimental melodrama, “The Vow” is a female wish-fulfillment fantasy as a husband (Channing Tatum) is determined to woo and win his wife (Rachel McAdams) again after she suffers a brain trauma and loses all memory of him and their life together.
“Tim and Eric’s Billion Dollar Movie” revolves around fame-courting, comedy morons Tim Heidecker and Eric Wareheim trying to recover money they squandered while trying to make a movie.
Anne Heche and James Tupper co-star in “Girl Fight” in a harrowing, cyber-bullying tale about studious Victoria “Tori” Lindsay, who desperately wanted to be part of her school’s “in” crowd.
Inspired by the true story of notorious burglars who raiding homes of Hollywood celebrities like Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan, “The Bling Ring” stars Jennifer Grey, Austin Butler and Yin Chang.
In “Beautiful Wave,” Aimee Teegarden plays a teen sent to spend the summer with her estranged grandmother (Patricia Richardson) on the surfing beaches of Santa Cruz, California.
History comes alive in “Cold War,” the powerful Peabody Award-winning, 18-hour CNN documentary narrated by Kenneth Branagh, including an extended interview with Cuban leader Fidel Castro.
For foreign film aficionados, “Plot of Fear” is a classic Italian horror flick told through ingenious flashbacks.
For family viewing, “Happiness is…Peanuts: Team Snoopy” is an all-new collection of sports-themed adventures with the entire Peanuts gang, while “Tom & Jerry: Around the World” contains 22 rip-roaring cartoons featuring the tussling twosome.
PICK OF THE WEEK: If you’re into this popular vampire vs. Lycan franchise, Kate Beckinsale returns as the warrior/goddess Selene in “Underworld Awakening,” the fourth entry in the action-horror series launched by Beckinsale’s real-life husband Len Wiseman back in 2003.
|
